It's Free to Ask

How well and how often do you ask for what you really want? I mean, what you really want. Not what you think you deserve, not what you think is possible or suitable or what someone else might want or expect – I mean asking for what YOU truly desire.

Are you comfortable expressing your Heart’s yearnings or do you squelch your passions because you are afraid? Afraid of what others might think, of not being good enough, of standing out, drawing attention and then god forbid, having increased responsibilities due to all your success? Perhaps you bite your tongue based on patterns of abuse and destructive behaviors? Maybe you afraid to ask for help because you think you have something to prove, feel like you are not worthy, because someone told you that you cannot have it?

You are not alone. Many are struggling in codependent relationships – living out of balance – not in alignment with their highest selves.For countless reasons, we have conceded our sovereignty, our authenticity and our divine right to a life filled with joy, fulfillment and connection to a sense of purpose. For some, verbal and emotional abuse have taught us it is better to keep our mouth shut. Other patterns are more subtle; we have been exposed to programming by mass media, influenced by collective societal fears, familial belief systems and our own creative imaginings. The result is a society of wildly creative, intelligent, imaginative beings, who are stifled by their own limiting beliefs – who have forgotten how powerful they are and how much support is available to them to manifest their best experience.

So how do we create a shift? (Great question 😊)“Closed mouths don’t get fed”

Asking questions is a gateway to manifestation. We can ask ‘small questions’ to simply put the quandary out there and let the law of attraction and our subconscious desires work together to bring forth an answer,and use curiosity & imagination to start the gears of making abstract thoughts become a reality. We can create a Vision Board to represent our goals and things we want to attract. We can also pray for something we want or make a wish. These can be wildly effective with the right combination of faith, hope and gratitude. Another way is far more literal – we want something, we ask for it.

My daughter Ana, as soon as she could start talking, started asking for things. She asked for whatever she wanted and expected the answer to be “Yes.” You have to first imagine me, a new mom with decades of self-esteem and self-worth issues, raised in post great depression era, as a middle child with a Victorian code of modesty, who learned early on not even to ask and there by avoid disappointment all together. I was held to a certain expectation around what is appropriate to ask for or not & mostly I just didn’t. So, I would be horrified, to give one example, as a stranger is approaching us in the mall carrying two large stuffed animals and a less than 4 year old Ana would square up, lock eyes, and simply ask, “Can I have one?” What is important to note here is Ana’s #1 ability to articulate her request #2 her absolute conviction that she will get what she’s asking for #3 has no attachment, guilt or shame associated with asking. She is completely aligned with her expectations being met & without any vibrational disruption or any sense of remorse for asking.

Immediately I am apologizing, trying to gain back our honor and sense of dignity, but I am being ignored and said stranger is giving my daughter not one but two of the over sized animals he was awkwardly balancing. Why?! Because she asked – it is that simple. That is just one of countless examples of her audacity. At first, I thought, ‘how is she going to learn? How will she learnt hat asking for things is inappropriate? How will she learn self-restraint and modesty? How will she tone herself down? Ignoring all the professional advice I’d given to adults about dreaming big and no limits, I was wresting with trying to teach my own daughter to tone down her requests – and that is how these belief systems get ingrained – by parents trying to prevent their children from harm or disappointment. For more on that, read Louise Hay, “You can Heal your Life.”  Lucky for me, eventually I was the one who learned what she was trying to teach me: The world is your oyster – ask and you shall receive.

Flash forward a few years, single mom, struggling to make ends meet, operating on faith, hutzpah and Love Buzz coffee  – I’m now certified as a Kaizen Muse Creative Coach and I’m leading Vision Board or as I like to call them, Dream Scheme workshops. Convinced that if I can teach enough people about the “Secret” and the law of attraction, to just Dream Big enough, that I can help change the world. I bring Ana everywhere with me, and in these workshops she helps reinforce that any age can make a vision board, no artistic ability is required – it is SO easy a child can do it…as instructed, she assembles her Dream Scheme - with images of Hawaii, tropical beaches, Miami, luxury hotel rooms & I’m shattered.I’m scared shitless that she’ll have to live with the disappointment of asking for too much, how am I ever going to get her to Hawaii, why am I misleading my own child and sending her down a path of disappointment? My head was done in.We still put up our posters in a place we could see them, but I stopped doing workshops. I went back to focusing just on my day job, selling nets for InCord.

About a year later, we vacationed at Hollywood Beach just north of Miami and within three years she accompanied me to an annual trade show for work in Hawaii and fulfilled her ultimate life goal (since kindergarten) of swimming with dolphins. She remained steadfast and held so firmly to her belief that even my overwhelming case of doubt could not derail what was meant to be. Mahalo Ana. I’ve since resumed my workshops and last year over 100 employees at InCord created their own Dream Schemes – many of whom have since completed courses, gone on dream vacations and purchased their first home.

Ask. Believe. Receive.

If you struggle to believe that in your supportive community,your loved ones would jump at a chance to help you then ask for a helper to be revealed or ask to be shown a way that you can be helpful. If you have a hard time asking for or receiving anything, you can start by just asking for Grace and an ability to receive with an open heart. Feel like you do not have anywhere to turn? Remember, your Angels are standing by, waiting to swoop in and help relieve your fears and reassure you that you are loved and adored – just ask. Ascended Masters, Spirit Guides, Mother Mary, Faeries – all ready to enrich your experience and engage with you – your request can be silent, just ask. Not sure what to ask for, Tarot can provide insights and guidance – ask what would serve your highest good or ask for your Life Path to be revealed. When in doubt, ask!  

Browse my Services section & let me know what calls to you, then tell me: What do you really, really want and how can I best help you to help yourself? Have fun truly exploring your passions and motives.Get bold, dream big & ask lots of questions!! Go ahead, ask, it’s free. 😊

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